Let’s get fucked up and die, I’m speaking figuratively of course, like the last time that I committed suicide, social suicide. Yeah, so I’m already dead, on the inside, but I can still pretend with my memories and photographs I have learned to love the lie.
flesh to flesh, heart to heart, i swear i will never let this go.
So now tell me how your story goes. Have you ever suffered? If so, did you get better or have you never quite recovered from it? Did you find your lover laying in your bedroom with another and then Did you let it hover over you and everything else well after the fact?
Show me all your bruises. I know everybody wears them. They broadcast the pain-how you hurt, how you reacted. Did cancer take your child? Did your father have a heart attack? Have you had a moment forced the whole heart to grow or retract?
Does anyone else notice how this sounds like some of Moving Mountains earlier work? I can’t help think Moving Mountains when listening to it.
I’m right here. But hey don’t worry about it I don’t care. Learning to do without it. Laying on the couch and staring at the wall like nothing at all. See how tame I can be; in the reflection I watch myself watching TV. And it’s too much to take and so I say to myself, “I never told you that I loved you because I don’t.” See how strange I can seem? Did I ever tell you about that one dream? Look there we are, where we used to be. Of all things I will soon grow tired. Don’t stop by; no, you don’t have to be around tonight. If you’re feeling like it. Stand out in the hallway, fall into my arms because I want you. Can’t you tell at all?
"Now Jesus Christ, I’m not what you had in mind. Jesus Christ, don’t cry. I made a list of everything I despise, and I wrote your name down several times. I’m waiting for my whole world to fall apart. I’m waiting for the storm to start. Well I deserve to be happy. Well I am dead again. I am dead again."